The old hotel

     its late and sleep stays an arm’s length away. I stare at the ceiling of the old hotel by the river counting the shapes and patterns that could use an update. The bed is soft and creaks with every move my restless body makes. I try to let the music coming through a window sooth me, but it only brings back memories of dancing with you to our song. Getting up and moving around the room with its out of date furnishings and a collection of smells that won’t let me remember your scent. One dim light on the nightstand is all that glows casting shadows that keep me company in a place I don’t want to be alone. I reached for the bottle of scotch I brought with me, and took a long drink hoping to ease my pain or at least dull it for a moment or two. You wanted to come back here to be laid to rest. It was your home town where the rest of your family was and side by side you would all be together. I did this for you because it’s what you wanted and because I loved you more than life. Tomorrow I will put on the suit you bought me five years ago and place a single red rose on your coffin saying good bye to you and hello to many more bottles of scotch. Life isn’t always fare, you got the short straw, I got the pain and the memory of our first night together in this dark, out of date, smelly room with dancing shadows and music flowing through an open window. We thought it was heaven.
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